Why baseball sucks...

I don't watch baseball anymore. I just can't do it...

That may not seem like an earth shattering statement to most of you but, for those who know me well, it will seem inconceivable. You see, baseball was my favourite sport (by far) for most of my life. I was the guy that would respond angrily to those who called the sport boring and claim that its players were not athletes. As a kid, I would spend hours upon hours not only organizing baseball cards, but memorizing the statistics on the backside of them. At seven years old I could tell you how many homeruns Mike Schmidt hit in 1980 or how many stolen bases or what Ron Guidry's ERA was in 1978. I played Strat-O-Matic baseball and snuck my WalkMan (those big yellow things were not easy to conceal) into class so I could listen to Grapefruit League games on the radio. I was on a first name basis with many of the ushers at Montreal's Olympic Stadium. To say I was obsessed would be a great understatement.

And now, I might watch an inning or two of the Blue Jays if I happen to flip by a game in search of something better. I can't even remember the last time I watched an entire game from beginning to end. Why did I fall out of love with baseball?

Certainly, the demise of my beloved Montreal Expos played a key role in my disillusionment. The news in 1994 that major leaguers were going out on strike was devastating. The Expos were comfortably in first place in the NL East and had the best record in all of baseball. It was the season that every fan had been dreaming of. Then, when the team folded ten years later and left Montreal for good, it was too much to take. I tried watching the Washington Nationals, but it wasn't the same. I tried to follow former Expos like Vladimir Guerrero, Orlando Cabrera and Jose Vidro as they moved around from team to team, but I just couldn't do it. But there is a lot more to it than that.

It turns out that all of the criticism about baseball that I fought against over all of those years is true. Baseball is long, drawn out and boring. Baseball players are fat, lazy egomaniacs. Well, a lot of them are fat and lazy, and most of them are egomaniacs. Worse still, baseball's supporting cast also seem to be afflicted with an overblown opinion of themselves. Starting at the top with MLB Commissioner Bud Selig, a self-serving buffoon of the first order, right down to the umpires, who seem to think that people pay $50 for a ticket to the stadium to see them. In between you have owners like George Steinbrenner, Jerry Reinsdorf and Jeffrey Loria, whose egos, stupidity and chequebooks continue to threaten the viability of 'America's pastime,' and managers like Ozzie Guillen and Lou Piniella, whose antics go way beyond those of his colourful 1940s, 50s and 60s predecessors. Even the anouncers are douchebags.

But the players are the main reason baseball is ruined for me. Certainly, there are many major leaguers who are great guys, but the sport is overrun by spoiled egomaniacs. And their high opinions of themselves are completely unwarranted. Relatively speaking, they are not great athletes. There are few professional sports that demand less from a fitness or toughness point of view (and they still need steroids). Yet, baseball players walk around with their chests puffed out as if they were God's own gift to professional sport. From years past you have Rickey Henderson, Reggie Jackson, Albert Belle, Bobby Bonilla, Roger Clemens, Gary Sheffield, Curt Schilling, Barry Bonds, Mark McGwire, John Rocker, and the list could go on and on and on. Today, those players have been replaced by the likes of AJ Pierzynski, Milton Bradley, Elijah Dukes, Alex Rodriguez and Manny Ramirez. As fans, how are we supposed to take these guys seriously?

To all those people who have been telling me for years and years that baseball sucks, all I can say is I am sorry for not listening to you, and you are right. Too bad it took me more than 30 years to figure it out.